Well,
not really. That’s actually wishful
thinking on my part but I had this title in my mind for a month when I really
thought things were settling down.
Ironically,
I started writing about Robert when I began caring for him but stopped (no –
let’s say paused) because I was
caring for Robert. My original intent
was to keep family and friends up to date and then I realized there was a lot
of caregiving information to share as well as people who followed along after
falling in love with Robert.
And
now I am neglecting this space!
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| Robert and Carol - before getting sick |
Please don’t take it personally.
Let’s
catch up!
Richard
(husband, co-caregiver, Mr. Macgyver, chronic pain sufferer who doesn’t let it
get him down and #1 brother-in-law) has been dealing with a non-healing,
expanding wound on his lower leg. The doctors have sent him to wound therapy
specialists, tried all kinds of wraps, antibiotics (because of recurring
infections) – even maggot therapy! (That
was as disgusting yet as fascinating as it sounds.)
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| Richard with his good luck angel from our friend, Pegi |
After
14 months of this wound continuing to grow, they finally suggested a skin graft. We were very hopeful Richard’s leg would
finally heal and his pain would go away.
Make no mistake: this wound was extremely painful. He usually had to
clean it twice a day which meant scrubbing it (yikes!). There was a great deal of screaming (from him)
and a lot of hoping the neighbors didn’t call the police on us (from me). Surgery
would be a welcome relief for everyone!
Surgery
was a week and a half before Christmas but he was out and home before Christmas
and our hopes were high for a successful graft.
Robert
(most excellent brother, word search king and Family Feud fanatic) woke up with
a fever and cough on Christmas. We had a
house full of family over to celebrate so loaded him up with his fever reducer
and antibiotics that we keep on hand for just such occasions. By the end of the day, Robert could not even
stand. It took both Other Brother and I to
take him to the bathroom and keep his legs under him so I could change his
brief. We got him to bed and hoped the antibiotics would kick in by
morning.
Yeah,
that didn’t happen. (This isn’t a
sitcom, after all.)
Richard
had a surgery follow-up appointment the next day so his brother, Mark, and
Carol stayed with Robert while I took Richard to the doctor. Robert was safe in bed but still running a
fever.
The
leg was looking good! The doctor was
very pleased and thought the graft had taken “98%”! Woohoo!
We were ecstatic.
As
we waited for a prescription, Mark called to tell us Robert was burning up.
Oh,
crap. So much for the antibiotics. I had Mark give Robert more Tylenol and we
hurried home.
By
the time we got home, Robert was not breathing well so we had to call the
paramedics. I try to avoid hospital
stays but this was unavoidable. Thank
goodness we did send him to the hospital because, as it turned out, he had the
flu and pneumonia along with a strange skin bacteria that caused sepsis!
I
couldn’t believe how quickly Robert went downhill. The hospital was the best place for him for
now.
The
last week of December passed in a blur but, as it happens, my birthday is that
week! Richard and Rachel (fabulous
daughter, animal lover and person who can make me double over with laughter)
made my birthday extra special. After visiting Robert in the morning and talking
to the doctors, we had breakfast at one of my favorite restaurants. Carol and
my BFF came to make the breakfast even more special. Afterwards, Rach took me
for a surprise spa pampering session which was just what I needed.
Bliss!
Within
a few days it was New Year’s Eve! Robert
continued to recover in the hospital with IV antibiotics, Richard’s leg was
almost like new and none of us had caught the flu from Robert. Carol was having issues with her blood
pressure dipping too low and was very tired but the flu seemed to have bypassed
all of us.
Phew!
The
three of us had a simple dinner and while I was doing dishes in the kitchen and
Richard was stretching his back in the living room, we heard Carol coughing in
the dining room. Then a loud thud.
It
took us a second to rush in to her (she drops things all the time and gets
irritated if we immediately come running.
Remember? Stubborn!).
I
got to her first and she was out cold. And bleeding from the head. I yelled for Richard to call 911 while I shook
Carol to wake up – all the while thinking she had a heart attack and had died.
It
took a minute but she woke up and we did what we could to figure out where the
bleeding was coming from (her head? her nose?) and stop it. Paramedics came and Carol was alert and
coherent. It didn’t appear to be a
stroke but was probably from the darn low blood pressure. She passed out and hit the corner of the wall
which caused a gash or two. Since she is
on blood thinners, there was a lot of blood.
Off
she went in the ambulance with Richard following close behind. I stayed home to clean up what looked like a
crime scene.
Did
I mention all the blood?
Happy
New Year.
January
was spent shuttling between hospitals (you didn’t think Robert and Carol could
be in the same hospital, right? That’d be too easy! At least the hospitals were just a few miles
apart though.) Carol was released to a
care facility to get physical therapy where she promptly got the flu.
Back
to the hospital for Carol.
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| Robert enjoying a field trip to the hospital cafeteria |
Robert
had to have long-term antibiotics so had a picc line installed in his neck
since his arm veins were shot. He went
to the physical therapy rehab floor of the hospital and eventually came home. Carol soon came home too.
Have
I lost you, yet? Let me recap: of the
four people living in our house, three were hospitalized within three weeks of
each other.
(This
blog could be super short if I just stayed with the recaps.)
Somewhere
in there, I got sick too (but not get-to-a-hospital sick), orchestrated an
office expansion/move for work and we converted Robert and Carol’s bathroom tub
to a walk-in shower (thanks to Matt, #1 son-in-law).
I
was hoping for some downtime after the office move and all the hospitalizations.
Who wouldn’t!
Richard’s
leg still had a spot about the size of a quarter that wouldn’t heal so that
became a bit worrisome. Carol’s cough continued while she also still declared
she would be returning to her own home very “soon.” Robert again became sick with a high fever
and ended up in the ER. This time it was
a respiratory virus so it had to run its course. It dramatically affected his breathing,
though, and he had to be on continuous oxygen, even after returning home.
It
is the middle of March and I am sitting in the office I now share with Richard
so Carol can have her own room (temporarily, of course). Richard has a second skin graft scheduled for
later this month but it is outpatient surgery and not a week long hospital stay. Carol has her cough again/still and has been
sleeping a great deal but at least her blood pressure is normal. Robert still has a bunch of congestion but we
are keeping up with his pulmonary health exercises and his vitals are fine.
I
think this is the moment I can come up for air.
It
is just a moment but I will take what I can get.
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| Richard and I taking a breather |
