At least Robert is happy when he's eating! |
We have been trying the “new” seizure medication, in varying
dosages, since February. Robert’s
neurologist thought we should try Trileptal so, in February, started him on 300
mg in the morning and evening.
After a week, we
had to give it up.
He was dizzy, cranky and could barely walk straight. Oh but
it was heartbreaking because the seizures had stopped!
I didn’t want to give up so quickly so at the next neurology
appointment, the doctor and I decided we could start
it up again at a much slower pace.
We started out with Robert getting 150 mg in the morning and 150 mg in
the evening.
We kept him on this dosage for three weeks. Robert was
cranky again and having a bit of difficulty walking but it wasn’t near as bad
as the side-effects while on the higher dose.
The seizures weren’t completely gone but the frequency had been reduced
significantly.
After about three weeks there were more seizures. More
seizures but his moodiness was better and his walking had improved. With the doctor’s approval, I increased
the Trileptal again. This time we
went to 150 mg in the morning and 300 mg in the evening. Richard and I thought if he had the stronger
dose in the evening the side-effects wouldn’t be so bad.
It was a really, really good theory.
We have kept Robert on the 150/300 regimen for over a month.
Robert’s balance and inability to walk continued to get
worse. There were times it actually seemed like he was getting better and the
side-effects weren’t that bad but after looking at the log we keep, that just
wasn’t the case.
The reality is he can barely move his legs in the morning.
It is routine now for me to help him out of bed in the morning since he can’t
get his legs working properly. Once he is up, he swerves with his walker with
his right leg usually a few steps behind the rest of him and his walker pushed
out as far as his arms can reach. No amount of coaching can get his legs and
arms and brain working in unison or even staying in the same zip code.
Robert’s moodiness also continued. Robert has always had angry outbursts (one
time when he lived in an assisted living facility he yelled for the nurse to “go
to hell.” When I talked to him about it he insisted he just said that in his
head and certainly wouldn’t say that out loud!)
Those outbursts are infrequent. Now they are an almost daily occurrence. Robert gets angry at anyone and everyone –
us, the transport drivers, the Day Program staff, the respite staff and the
dogs. He is hypersensitive to
everything: noise, water temperature – even his gums are sensitive.
Day Program called to tell me that they are concerned about
Robert’s safety. They have to occasionally put him in a wheelchair because of
his fall risk but now he is arguing about having to sit in a wheelchair.
In addition to all of this, Robert developed excessive
saliva which was not helping his congestion problem. He even choked a few times
on it! Yikes!
It seems so obvious that we shouldn’t subject him to this
medication with these awful side-effects but I kept thinking there were other
reasons for these behaviors. Maybe it’s
the bronchitis he keeps getting; maybe it’s all the turmoil of the house
upgrades; maybe his swallow problem is getting worse. Maybe he has some other
problem going on that is unrelated to the medication.
It actually wasn’t so obvious with all these “maybes” swirling
in my head. Plus, it is hard to dismiss the
fact the medication is working to reduce his seizures.
His seizures have dropped from a high of 59 in February to
54 in March, 40 in April and 20 in May. Oh my god! He is having a third of the seizures he had
before starting on the medication. A third!!
It is only because of this that I kept Robert on Trileptal
for this long. I kept thinking the side-effects would wear off. That we would see the “old” Robert and he
would be able to move from room to room with some wobbliness but not what we’re
seeing now. That once the house was back
to normal and his congestion cleared up we would see his mood improve and his
ability to walk come back.
I wanted to be sure we gave this medication enough of a shot
before saying, “Nope. It’s just not worth the cost.”
I finally think we did.
I have come to the conclusion we have to take him off this
medication. I have a message in to the neurologist so he can tell me how long I
should take to wean him off the meds. In the meantime, I reduced the dose back
to 150/150.
We gave this a shot.
A really good shot but it’s doing more harm than good. We have to give up on this medication. I hate
to quit or give up on anything but I know it’s the right thing to do.
I still have faith we will find something that works but I
am not looking forward to increased seizures in the meantime.
4 comments:
I am so sorry Trish.... I know how disappointing this is for you. Sometimes we have to make tough decisions and from me staying updated with the saga of Robert's medication I believe you are making the right decision.
I hope that you get the "old" Robert back.
Hugs:o)
Jane
(((Big Hugs!))) So many tradeoffs here. I agree with Jane -- you have been diligently keeping track of all the pieces and you are working on constructing the best and most loving puzzle possible. <3
Oh Trish, what a heartbreak. You are so diligent with Robert, no one could do better. You're all in my heart and prayers daily. Hoping the days of excellent are coming soon. <3
Jane, e_journeys and Pegi, I apologize for the late reply. I so appreciate all of the support you give to me, Richard and Robert. You are all a treasure to me. <3
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